Plane talk by Joe Hoshaw

Daily barrage of Y2k talk is getting just a wee bit out of hand

It was probably only six to eight months ago when I was having a real hard time trying to remember that clever little abbreviation for the dastardly "Millennium Bug."

Was it the 2XY, the K2R or the K toY bug? If you would have asked me back in October I likely would have stumbled through a variety of number-letter combinations before saying, "You know - that computer bug thing."

Now, however, it seems as if it's been branded into my forehead. If you've had any contact at all with the civilized world over the past few months, you know that "Y2k talk" is inescapable. It's absolutely everywhere and arises in virtually every form imaginable.

In an effort to one-up the standard litany of foreboding news reports on the bug, one local TV new program has begun reporting on "Y2 Chaos" (pretty cute, eh?).

In the private sector, clever marketers are examining all the potential avenues for profiting from Y2k. Take, for example, the Asian automaker that has been trying to convince us that the acronym really means "Yes2Kia."

The truly scary thing is we've still got more than a half a year to go. Just how much more millennium madness are we going to endure? Unfortunately, the short answer to that question is, "A lot."

As the end of the year draws closer, the real problem is going to be trying to sort out the reality from the hype. Will people try to seek out factual information on the bug, or will they hear only the reams of stories about people buying gas generators and stockpiling food and withdrawing gobs of money from their bank accounts - and then do the same?

Our knowledge of human nature as it has evolved over the last couple millenniums would tend to support the latter.

Which raises another question: Which should we fear more, Y2k or fear of Y2k? In order to find the answer, it might be helpful to recall the Arab Oil Embargo of 1974 and the subsequent "gas shortage" that panicked the United States.

Looking back on that situation a quarter of century later, many people now doubt if there ever was any true "crisis." Oh, it certainly seemed that way at the time. There were those long, long lines of cars at gas stations, which, in many cases, couldn't keep up with demand and had to shut down.

But was there ever really a shortage that threatened our ability to operate our motor vehicles and lawnmowers? Or did a self-perpetuating panic simply upend the supply chain enough to cause spot shortages? And did those spot shortages, in turn, heighten the fear, sending even more people out to sit in long gas station lines to top off their already 3/4-filled tanks? Hmmm.

Y2k seems to fit the same mold. It will only be a crisis to the degree that the public reacts with a crisis mentality.

Beyond that, it stands a very good chance of becoming the biggest non-news story of the millennium.